Author: Thomas More

Memo to Ann Coulter:

When Michelle Malkin denounces you for being over the top, you’ve got a problem. Seriously.

Still, though, please keep it up. Ramp it up if possible. Say every single hateful, racist, bigoted thing that your slavering followers are thinking but dare not say. Cap it off with another performance at CPAC 2008 – maybe you can call Barack Obama a half-breed nigger terrorist-lover or something. (Just an idea – feel free to steal it.) Because the Democrats are going to need all the help they can get to take back the White House next year.

Godspeed, Ann.

UPDATE: Shorter “Hot Air” comment section:

Calling someone a “faggot” is no big deal. When I was growing up, we called each other “faggots” all the time, and it didn’t have anything to do with whether anyone was homosexual – or, as we have to say now, “gay.” Damn fags and their euphemisms. Go Ann!

When I heard the news story today about the explosion in Ramadi, I laughed. Which makes me a bad person. But when the U.S. government tries to minimize the reports of a truck bomb killing 18 children on a soccer field by saying, no, we set off the explosion ourselves, and it just wounded 30 people – we’re down the rabbit hole.

Further down.

If Hillary Clinton gave the fantasy speech outlined by Gary Kamiya in Salon, I just might consider voting for her. But she won’t, not in a million years. So I won’t. Simple, no?

“I love America. Just because I think gay dudes should be allowed to adopt kids and we should all drive hybrid cars doesn’t mean that I don’t love America.”

-Liz Lemon (Tina Fey), “30 Rock”

“30 Rock” is one of the best-written shows on TV right now, and definitely the best-written (and funniest) comedy. No surprise, since Tina Fey jumped ship as head writer on SNL to write and star in her own show. Alec Baldwin is also fantastic as GE exec Jack Donaghy, who has a giant photo of a toaster on the wall in his office.

Speaking of offices, “The Office” is brilliant, but I don’t think it’s a “comedy” in the traditional TV sense. The tone and aims are completely different.

If you haven’t seen “30 Rock,” give it a chance. I don’t want this one to get cancelled.

This Modern World nails how I feel every time some anti-science nut like Dean Esmay (who also believes passionately that Terri Schiavo could have lept out of her hospital bed if just given a chance, and that HIV is harmless) laughs at Al Gore or writes some variation of this:

Boy, it sure was cold today. And we got 7 inches of snow overnight. Someone call Al Gore!

I think I need to take a break from the browser when every time I open it, my most common emotion is “loathing.”

UPDATE: Some high-quality braying from Dean and his flying monkeys about Al Gore’s Oscar win last night. Al better watch out – a few more good works, and he might surpass Jimmy Carter as Most Hated Man on Earth for the crapweasels.

Rolling Stone’s Matt Taibbi gives voice to anger over a national media that is a lot more concerned with Britney Spears’ hairdo and Anna Nicole’s “death fridge” than anything that matters in this world. The thing is, just like our government, in this country we have the exact media that we deserve.

A choice comment from a Freeper called “Catholic Canadian,” in a discussion about former NBA star Tim Hardaway’s statement that he “hates gay people”:

“At one point, I tried to be tolerant of gays that I met. I would talk to them as normal individuals. After awhile though, all civilised talk with them decends into lewd and suggestive sexual comments, innuendo, attempts at touching and suggestions that you go back to their place.”

Uh huh.

The latest salvo in the right wing’s war against environmentalism? Hybrid cars are dangerous because they are too quiet, and thus threaten the safety of the blind.

I’m not making this up.

“That’s not a real story,” says my brother.
“Yes it is! I’ll send you the link.”
“You must have left something out,” he says, incredulous.
“No. It’s real,” I say.
“Are you sure that isn’t an Onion story? Because I would laugh at it if it was in the Onion.”

This story is hilarious for many reasons. But the one that leaps to mind is, I can imagine right-wingers trying to come up with a list of reasons why hybrid cars should be banned. But I can’t for the life of me imagine them coming up with that one in a million years.

I’m tired of fighting. So this is to announce that from now on I believe the following:

-The King James Version of the Bible is the inerrant word of God.
-Abortion is murder.
-Global warming is a hoax.
-HIV does not cause AIDS.
-Valerie Plame was not a covert agent.
-Saddam had WMD.
-Saddam helped plan 9/11.
-The minimum wage hurts the poor.
-George W. Bush is a Texas rancher.
-Bill and Hillary Clinton killed Vince Foster.
-Tom Cruise is not gay.
-Gay sex is indistinguishable from rape, incest and bestiality.
-Iraq is not in the middle of a civil war.
-$9 billion missing in Iraq is no big deal.
-George W. Bush is the reason we haven’t had a terrorist attack since 9/11.
-Ann Coulter is funny, sexy, and correct.
-Michael Moore is a holocaust denier.
-Hybrid cars are dangerous because they are too quiet.
-Anyone who criticizes the Iraq war or the President is a traitor.
-The more guns we have, the safer we are.

If more revelations come to me, I’ll add them. Thanks for your attention.

This isn’t a pop culture weblog, although pop culture is another of my abiding interests. And I do tend to focus, as some commenters like to point out, on stuff that “angries up my blood,” as Grandpa Simpson says. So I couldn’t pass up this Entertainment Weekly writeup on ABC’s “Lost,” which has suffered a major loss in audience (including me) this season:

Nobody is more proud – and more defensive – about Lost than [series star Matthew] Fox. The fall from amazing grace? That’s just the headline-hungry media tearing down what the cast and crew built up. The ratings decline? Those were simply hype-intrigued looky-loos who’ve decided Lost isn’t for them and gravitated toward less complicated fare. “Good riddance,” says Fox.… And what of the devotees who yearn for those innocent invisible-peanut-butter-flavored beach days? “The people who rag on it that way aren’t strong enough fans, really,” he says. “Those people are copping out.”

Memo to Matthew Fox: fuck you. You’re an actor on a television show – a show that started with a handful of intriguing ideas that then proceeded to systematically crap all over them. This show made you a star, and it might not be the best move to be insulting the very people who put you there.

It physically pains me to channel Laura Ingraham, but shut up and act.